Read "The Science of Happily Ever After What Really Matters in the Quest for Enduring Love" by Ty Tashiro available from Rakuten Kobo. Sign up today and get. Read Books The Science of Happily Ever After (PDF, ePub, Mobi) by Ty Tashiro Books Online for Read. In this playful and informative exploration of the science behind how to choose a great mate, acclaimed relationship psychologist Dr. Ty Tashiro explores how to.
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Editorial Reviews. Review. "Complete with exercises, quizzes, sound advice, and a practical yet supportive tone, Tashiro offers the closest thing to a roadmap for. HAPPILY EVER AFTER is the ending to the fairy tale love stories we hear as children, but in the real world this fairy tale ending can be tough to find. In The. Start by marking “The Science of Happily Ever After: What Really Matters in the Quest for Enduring Love” as Want to Read: In this playful and informative exploration of the science behind compatibility, Dr. Ty Tashiro explores how and why we fall in love. Dr. Tashiro, an.
J Finn. Pretty Girls. That said, it was pretty interesting information--the basic premise of the book is that there a bell curve of traits that humans fall into and you need to think about and prioritize which traits he says you hav As with most of the nonfiction I've read, I feel like this fell into the trap of oversimplifying scientific data, contradicting itself, using anecdotal evidence excessively, prosing inconcisely okay neither of those are words--I'm saying the prose was not particularly concise. Many of the studies presented in the book while some what interesting did not garb my attention like the personal stories. The Perfect Neighbors. Drop them. It's a reckless jump because he doesn't inquire into any of the mechanisms by which people all of whom have some combination of the 5 basic personality traits he relies on interact, and he doesn't discuss whether there's any variation depending on one partner's personality actually, he does once, briefly, and the findings undercut his main thesis--"neurotics were actually more likely to break up with partners who were low in neuroticism compared to partners who were high in neuroticism" --by showing that for one group of people, choosing a partner with a "better" personality would lead to a higher chance of breaking up.
I thought it was interesting and informative, and I could think back to my younger days and wish I had known then what I learned from Dr.
Tashiro in this book. His recommendations make sense and are illustrated with examples from real-life people, which keeps i I won this book in a Goodreads Giveaway and spent my time while reading thinking of single friends who would enjoy it. His recommendations make sense and are illustrated with examples from real-life people, which keeps it all quite entertaining.
This book could be very useful if you are seeking that certain special someone.
I plan to give it to my younger daughter, who is actually in this seeking phase of her life. Dec 06, bartosz rated it really liked it Shelves: I saw this book name dropped when searching for books on the neuroscience of relationships.
Unfortunately, it wasn't exactly the book I was hoping for, yet it is an entertaining read in its own right. The Science of Happily Ever After by Ty Tashiro is a pop-sci book taking a data-driven approach to finding the partner of your life. The author defines "happily ever after" as a lasting relationship in which both liking and lust are fulfilled and describes which factors contribute to that outcome.
Th I saw this book name dropped when searching for books on the neuroscience of relationships. The book starts off with a simple assumption - by being too picky about potential partners we greatly diminish our chances of finding The One.
Assuming normal and independent distributions, wishing for a partner with well-above-average looks, intelligence, and emotional stability might leave us with low odds of finding a partner. Adding a couple of more wishes creates a probabilistic impossibility. So, if we only get to pick three wishes it would be good to know what characteristics give the best "return of investment" for a stable relationship. Most people squander their wishes selecting for looks, which don't predict relationship quality well and deteriorate over time; and wealth, which predicts the relationship quality quite well - but only until a couple collectively escapes the poverty level.
Then if those features aren't meaningful in the long run, what is? The author proposes three framework of traits immutable characteristics that have some predictive power about relationship quality: The book suggests which traits in these frameworks are desirable in a partner high agreeableness, low neuroticism, trusting relations with parents, not-assigning blame when solving problems and how to filter for them in a confusing dating scenario.
The book is written by a practicing couples therapist in a simple conversational style. Each chapter follows the same pattern: I was enamored by how the feeling based matter of relationship was dissected by the evidenced based approach taken by the author. Although most what's discussed applies to any type of monogamist relationship, the book's target reader is a single woman looking for a man. Even though, I'm usually very wary of psychological research, the factors are so down-to-earth-logical that I'd be hard pressed to disagree with any claim given in the book being a little less wary of confirmation bias.
Even if I'm not quite sold on the power of attachment theory I can easily admit that the type of relationship between your partner and his parent can have some say on the type of relationships they will seek; people that are neurotic aren't fun to be around; and people that are novelty seekers might be fun to be around but get bored easily.
I liked the book a lot, but I felt that there were obvious stuff missing: The Science of Happily Ever After was a cheerful read - the anecdotes are cute, the writing is clear and explains scientific concepts in layman terms.
Even where the author discussed things that were painfully obvious, he did it in a way that I was happy to read about an old truth being always preferable to new bullshit. All in all, a solid, comfy book about a topic most single people would find dear. May 05, Rachel rated it it was ok.
This book started out well, but mostly it just made me depressed. Humans are complicated and messy and terrible and wonderful. Despite the author's warning that singles cannot wish for too many things in a partner, "The Science of Happily Ever After" makes it seem like you actually do need to check off a bunch of boxes before considering a long-term relationship with someone.
Let them go. Doesn't have the greatest parents? Drop them. My real question is I'd be curious to know how the author himself feels he stacks up as a potential romantic partner -- does he truly think most people, himself included, would meet all the prerequisites he outlines? Now that would be enlightening. Mar 08, Russell Goulet rated it really liked it.
Ty Tashiro ties together real-life situations with extensive research examples to offer a look at finding enduring love. Tashiro avoids the trap of treating the material as just dry research by providing good information about what it takes to successful select a partner not just for life but also for a happy life. The Science of Happily Ever After offers helpful tips about what to look for in a mate and how to avoid common pitfalls that hamper this search. Tashiro offer examples of what to look for in a relationship and what traits are most sought after in a relationship.
The information in the book could be helpful in the quest for finding a lasting partnership. The book was read after receiving a copy through the Good Reads First Reads offer.
Mar 26, Mai rated it really liked it Shelves: The science of happily ever after is about the process of partner selection based on scientific research which is very eye-opening and insightful In a nutshell,this book tells you what really matters when it comes to choosing a partner which is to focus on personality traits rather than looks or wealth.
You have got only three wishes for love which means that you have to wish for three traits in a partner ,more than three traits and you will narrow down your options and exclude lots of potentia The science of happily ever after is about the process of partner selection based on scientific research which is very eye-opening and insightful In a nutshell,this book tells you what really matters when it comes to choosing a partner which is to focus on personality traits rather than looks or wealth.
You have got only three wishes for love which means that you have to wish for three traits in a partner ,more than three traits and you will narrow down your options and exclude lots of potential partners then finding out your and your partner's attachment style will also help you making the relationship work when it gets tough I gained lots of insight reading this book and hopefully that will help me choose wisely and get me to my happily ever after ,Highly recommend for singles: Jan 21, Curtis Hodges rated it liked it.
The book was easy to read and written in a format for all readers to enjoy. However, at times some of the points in the book seems redundant. The author also shares many studies and personal stories regarding how relationships function. The personal stories were by far the best part of the book. Many of the studies presented in the book while some what interesting did not garb my attention like the personal stories.
Overall I give it a three our of five.
May 31, Anna rated it liked it. I really wish I could give this 2. There's plenty of useful information here, just not as much in the way of practical application as I'd have hoped for. It's definitely written with for those who are currently single, so the applications suggested are much less useful for those already in a long term relationship.
Oct 19, Dr. I definitely enjoyed Dr. Tashiro's research and conclusions. His work is thoroughly supported by empirical evidence and based on testable frameworks. This work can be summarized as follows: This claim is based on the concept of likelihoods of a given population possessing an entire set of traits to satisfy the seeker.
The more criteria to be met for candidate qualification, the I definitely enjoyed Dr. The more criteria to be met for candidate qualification, the fewer prospects available to choose from. However, I disagreed with his claims about neurotics because I and many others possess some neurosis to a degree.
In fact, today's secularized societies often arouse neurotic behaviors because of their highly stressful cultures. Neurosis is a very common trait among young generations today due to economic, societal, cultural, familial, marital, and political challenges not previously faced by older generations.
Is a person avoiding "what they should be doing", thereby holding the person back from "moving forward into uncharted territory"? Jun 16, Keely rated it liked it. I picked up this book after reading Tashiro's more recent work, "Awkward: Don't get me wrong--there are many val In "The Science of Happily Ever After," psychologist Ty Tashiro explores what leads to lasting love relationships.
Don't get me wrong--there are many valuable relationship insights in here, especially for single people, who are the intended audience for this book, but also for an old married like me. The book examines how personality traits, and attachment styles affect love relationships.
It places particular emphasis on how many of us get it so wrong--how early romantic infatuation blinds us to our partner's actual personality traits and attachment style, leading us to make poor long-term relationship choices. The book goes on to discuss how to prioritize and actively seek the partner qualities most important to you. Tashiro carries the theme of getting three and only three wishes in a romantic partner throughout the book, and I felt like this construct became a little labored by the end.
Long story short: A wish for big money or supermodel good looks in a partner is probably a wish squandered, in that these things automatically rule out a huge chunk of potential partners, many of whom might be a better fit for you, and therefore better choices for long-term happiness.
I'm a little on the fence myself.
Jul 16, Amanda Stoddard Rowan rated it liked it. As with most of the nonfiction I've read, I feel like this fell into the trap of oversimplifying scientific data, contradicting itself, using anecdotal evidence excessively, prosing inconcisely okay neither of those are words--I'm saying the prose was not particularly concise.
That said, it was pretty interesting information--the basic premise of the book is that there a bell curve of traits that humans fall into and you need to think about and prioritize which traits he says you hav As with most of the nonfiction I've read, I feel like this fell into the trap of oversimplifying scientific data, contradicting itself, using anecdotal evidence excessively, prosing inconcisely okay neither of those are words--I'm saying the prose was not particularly concise.
That said, it was pretty interesting information--the basic premise of the book is that there a bell curve of traits that humans fall into and you need to think about and prioritize which traits he says you have three wishes--or traits to choose--otherwise you reduce the mathematical possibility of finding a partner at all will maximize relationship stability and satisfaction before you get into a relationship.
Without this deliberate forethought, your relationship quality will be subject to chance. He goes on to argue that wealth and attractiveness used to be important evolutionary traits for relationships, but in modern times and developed nations, the evolutionary impact of those traits is greatly reduced, so we should be instead focusing on other people's attachment styles, personality style like Big 5 personality style , relationship patterns, etc.
The usefulness of this information could be more relevant if you are not already in a committed relationship.
Jan 04, Danielle rated it really liked it Shelves: I think the best way to describe this book is delightfully informative. The Science of Happily Ever After talks about how people choose their partners and what they do wrong or right in doing it. It goes into great detail its easy to follow and just fun to read. I think it would really help any reader in what to keep in mind when searching for the "perfect" partner.
I did have a few helpful self-insights, and I appreciated the tips on looking for signs more objectively in relationships. Jan 05, Candace rated it did not like it. I got this book thinking since it was written by a Dr it would be more factual than option based. The author did not seem open minded what so ever and personally driven in a large portion of the book.
I got this book with the intent of gaining knowledge, not being repulsed with this book. Love advice for cynical folk I enjoyed this book fair more and for very different reasons than I thought I would. I appreciate the logical science based approach to ones love life.
Aug 31, Jennifer rated it it was amazing Shelves: Such a good book. Feb 15, Katie rated it really liked it Shelves: Interesting, but kind of depressing. Your odds of staying happily married and of finding a spouse with all the characteristics you're looking for are very low, basically.
Nov 17, Andrew Lee rated it really liked it. They are associated with abusive behavior and explosiveness during conflicts. In long run, however, they provide less relationship stability. Nice guys: Ideal partner would be moderate in neuroticism, moderate in novelty seeking and high in agreeableness. What distinguishes a great marriage from a good marriage is how much appreciation trumps tolerance. The chances of a secure child becoming an insecure adult is higher than vice-versa.
Research shows that people end up picking partners who has similar attachment style while they would be better of picking partners with secure attachment style test here.
Anxious insecure attachment has shown to have association with increased risk of heart diseases, it also correlates with poor management of illness. Insecure attachment causes conflicts during interactions and leads to lower relationship quality.
Avoidant attachment causes lower connectedness and hence, lower relationship quality. If you are an avoidant individual: Also rate oneself using the same metrics. Make wishes — List of 10 wishes you want in the life partner, rank them and select top 3.
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The Science of Happily Ever After.